Chicken-Hearted

     My name is Amanda and the strangest thing happened to me a week ago. I’ll tell you in my own words.  I was feeling kind of strange and I took some generous advice and went to the doctor. The doctor said, “Well, let me take a look at your lungs and heart. Your lungs look fine now lets take a look at your heart. Jumping Jahosafat! Your heart has a head and legs of a small chicken sticking out of it. And your capillaries, veins, arteries, atriums, and ventricles are filled with eggs! What happened to you?”  I explained, “Well, I was at Hunkel-berrie’s Farm (even though Mr. Hunkel-berrie banded me last year.) How did I get in you ask? Well, I dressed in a weird disguise and quickly hopped the oak fence. Into the horse’s coral, there happened to be a brown Clydesdale in the horse’s coral and he looked mad. “Nice horse” I said. The horse gave a snarl and started charging at me. I ran across the coral and hopped the front fence in the coral and stuckout my tongue at that Clydesdale. Then, I went to pet the gentler horses. I slowly looked to my right to see a beautiful cow. I walked over and pet her sweet head. Then, I pet the sheep and………..”
“Get to the point to Amanda.” Doc said, “Did you go by any chickens?” “I was getting to that.” I said. “I saw a chicken. I went to that chicken and started jumping up and down and clucking to make her mad. Boy mad did she get.”
     I continued, “First she threw a fit by running around and clucking. Then jumping up and down and clucking she started. To see if she was okay, I walked into the coop. That was the biggest mistake of the day. Wait, no.  That was the biggest mistake of my whole life! She stared at me. Then to finish it off she ran over to me and bit me. She was as mad as a raging bull.  After that she acted like a normal chicken again it was weird. The rest of the day I was fine. I watched cow and chicken cartoons, did the chicken dance to make fun of her, and then ate baked chicken to throw it in her face.” “That’s very interesting, indeed, Amanda.” Doc said.  “I know Doc. It was interesting.” I replied.
     I went on to tell my story. “I was in the mood for chicken the rest of the week. Then I went to the park for a stroll and this white powder puff fell out from sky. I hid behind a nearby oak tree to protect myself. An unkind, selfish, rude and sour as a lemon man told me, that he had a problem and he had better go to a doctor right away. That night as I lay in bed I thought about that kind, nonselfish, unrude, as sweet as candy gentleman telling me that advice. That’s why I’m here, Doc. Now tell me, WHAT’S MY PROBLEM?”
     The doctor said “I know you’ve got a chicken in your heart and feet coming out of your heart and your ventricles, atriums, arteries, veins, and your capillaries are clogged with chicken eggs. I need to examine you because I see you have all the symptoms of chicken-hearted. “Ahh get it off, GET IT OFF!” I screamed. “Calm down.” he said quietly. He said that there’s some kind of treatment. He explained, “Here are your choices. You can get the chicken removed and have the eggs roll in the middle and possibly grow another chicken, or get rid of the eggs and leave the chicken in your heart. Your final choice is get both the chicken and the eggs removed from your heart.” “I’ll take the third choice. Now just do it!!!” I yelled.
    Now I’m back to normal once again.